Community and the Roles of Women

On our drive in to work today, my mom and I stumbled on an oft fought about topic, community, that I had enough sense to avoid. The topic arose due to an almost colourful discussion about weddings, primarily their cost, and why I wouldn't invite kids and more so why I don't Cheryl should (but that's not my call anyways).... My mom believes the decline of the church basement wedding is the reason for the incline in divorce. In that without a community behind you and the fundamental understanding that your future together is about just that, and not the extravagant wedding day, which may actually begin the insidious unraveling of the fairytale via the incurred debt. Well a church wedding is out of the question these days for various reasons - one most females my age and their mothers can't cook, secondly, we don't have that kind of community. The church has become like Walmart, and community is now small business, pushed out as the everything for everybody train has roared on through. My mom insists that will all change shortly. And like most conversations with my mom, I wonder where has she been? Or if this is another one of those conversations I haven't been privy to. Change toward community? The last time I checked, Lakewood and similar churches were growing, as our population finds the kind of church it likes, Krispy Kreme spirituality, sickeningly sweet and fluffy with minimal nutritional value. Sure it's a fad, but it's a fad where the only answer to go back to the basics. Basics are on par with sensible eating and exercise, and the reality that Krispy Kreme curdle happening on your thighs didn't occur overnight and nor will it disappear so readily. Most likely it will still remain, require hard work and if shortcuts are used, more damage will likely occur. Why then even start? Because that's who we are, the fad diet, make it faster, make it easier generation. We have drive through food, Starbucks, ATM's and drug stores all because parking our cars and walking the 5 minutes to the door is too much. We can't fathom anything else.

All these issues with community relate into a much smaller, yet universal issue Pastor John brought up last week - the roles of men and women. I was concerned with the topic, unsure if I would find myself leaving unable to stomach a discussion on who and what I should be. There were issues of concern - namely the dislike of feminism (my support blogged about on msnspace blog previously). The point I did like, which i think has a lot to do with our current state of community, is the lack of leadership. Without individuals answering their calls to leadership, there is no framework for smaller communities to be born and flourish. A component of this leadership is male, and it's not there. In my peer group (ages 27-24 approx) there is minimal leadership appearing from within, and that leads to other problems as mentioned on Saturday. What do you do with a problem like me? Stubborn, focused, educated and even worse missions leaning, and there isn't anyone I feel like I could partner with. I may be a feminist, but I have no intention on marrying a doormat and that's all I've found. It appears to be asking too much to find someone interested in issues of social justice, missions and a life outside the consumer drive society of industrialized nations.

Just a few more issues I have to deal with, navigate and hopefully find my way over the threshold on these ones and if not, maybe find a naive peace about it all...