Oh, Donald...

Jocelyn and I often have coffee after Tenth - and last week we were talking about the fall-out from Three. One thing Jocelyn said has been rolling around in my brain, or more so colliding like an out of control pin-ball is, "I want to have an intellectual crush on a guy...." It's funny, we function/interact with a society that wants to have a physical crush on someone - a lust based attraction to a girl's "rack" or a guy's six pack - or anything else that the person can provide - a commercialization of a person, which is ultimately what lust is, the concern for personal gratification/need above another's need. It's funny she said this in regards to Three because the issue of lust itself has also been pin-balling around my brain as well, looking back I see lust and the overall focus of self in him - in the way I was treated and more so in the way it ended - when the fantasy of who I was going to be - of how I was going to make his life whatever he desired crashed with the realization that I was not that person or had no desire to be that person his response was one counter to what I would consider normal and rather much like Amnon - I was the guilty party - I was the one to be vilified - I was the one who failed in the fulfilling the fantasy. It's made me conscious of this issue to the point where I would have to agree with Jocelyn but in reverse - I would like someone to have an intellectual crush on me - to see the brain first and foremost, but ya I can't say I don't agree with Jocelyn - I guess that's one thing that does make me a little odd, I'm looking for a smart boy - does such a thing exist? I jest, not worries, there are plenty of you out there I know this already - like Donald Miller...

Boy, Oh Boy...

If you aren't a reader of my other blog, you should be, because then you would know that I just this past weekend sojourned across the border to the land of the catcall and pickup line. I know the US is known for a lot of other things, but apparently sexually aggressive men is one of their lesser known commodities. I've said it before - I don't look at you like that so don't look at me like that, and I guess I can expand that to - if you wouldn't say that with your mother next to you, then why would you say that? It wasn't just the lame pick up attempt or the cat call, every service guy seems to not be aware that the line between customer service friendly and trying to get my number number friendly is one that they've crossed. It's unnerving and offensive at times.
And at the same time I cannot seem to get anyone interested in me on this dating site. Yes I'm aware of the hypocrisy of that statement. Yes, I have made it public that I believe I'm not to marry - and maybe all this is evidence of that. I'm not sure. But I do find it a big fascinating as a whole, when I've made the attempt to be friendly - and the response has been cold - versus the one blond, feminist none the less gets the attention. Hmm. Well in the end at least I've found another vegan, tattoo menno - so I guess the two of us can join forces in our attempts...

The pic? Well lets just say that's a pretty good representation of the guys who tried quite lamely I might add to pick us up on Friday night. It's couresty of http://flickr.com/photos/74561290@N00/